My First Best Friend

Kindergarten

Bill and I used to wait together until it was time to go to St. James Elementary School, where we went to kindergarten. I remember sitting on the floor with him, drawing pictures of stage coaches. I do not remember if TV was around yet, but we both knew what those coaches looked like, and we attempted to draw pictures showing them being chased by robbers. That was what we knew of the "wild west" back them, and we also played at that in the yard near our homes.

Exploring Washington

We did not see much of Mr. Berry back then. Elton was busy at the State Department, so Ruth hauled both Bill and I all around the D.C. area, often to the Smithsonian, where we used to climb on World War I tanks that were outside the Arts and Industries building. The A$I building was the original home of the Air and Space Museum. We would wander inside that building, looking at models of ships, and real airplanes hanging from the ceiling. It was heaven for two kids like us.

The Evil Army

I do not remember much about a game Bill made up during this time, but it went like this.

There were evil forces working around Washington D.C., and their headquarters was in the Washington Monument. If they saw us, we were doomed, so any time we drove around the city, we were always on the lookout for that monument. If either one of use spotted it, we had to duck behind the front seat to escape from them.

It got worse.

The evil forces all drove Buicks, so we had to hide from them as well. The Buicks we were the most on alert for were those old ones that had three holes on the hood on each side.

I never figured out what those holes were for, but surely, it was to shoot ray guns at us. So we hid from those as well! Hey! We were kids!

Moving time

Bill and I hung out together for several years, until my family got a bit bigger, and we moved into a still larger apartment a few blocks away. Bill's family moved even further away, almost two miles to a small brick home. We still got together a lot, as our moms were also best friends by now. I remember Bill having a really cool comic-book collection, and he was very hooked on Scrooge McDuck. He had dozens of comics on that character.

Bill and I would spend hours in his room, sometimes sitting in a big wooden box he used to store his collection. We would pour over those comics, reading about silly comic characters. I always had a vision of rich folks with rooms full of coins stored in them. Scrooge would dive into his stash. How he did that and did not get a concussion from hitting all that metal is a mystery!

Bill's Big Adventure

As we got old enough to move to high school, Bill's dad was assigned to the Embassy in Ghana. The family was gone for several years, and I got into model airplanes with new friends I met at school. When Bill came back, we continued to hang out, and he would tell me tales of living in Africa. He had quite a time there.

One day, Bill and I were exploring a new construction site in Falls Church. The site was full of steel beams that would become a new building, so Bill and I started climbing on them playing steel workers. I took one misstep, and fell on the beams, cutting my chest on a sharp edge.

Tough kid that I was, I tried to shake this fall off, but I was bleeding and we decided to get back home, so Bill's mom could check me out. My mom was working in the Pentagon!

The reason I remember this so well, was Bill's family had a visitor that day, a doctor from Africa was in town, and he was in Bill's living room in full native dress when Bill and I ran into the room. I was shocked by what I saw, I never had seen any living person in such an outfit. I had seen things like this in the Smithsonian, though! Bill, on the other hand was just fine, this was normal to him.

The doctor jumped into action, took my shirt off, and inspected the near fatal wound (or so we thought!). He put some ointment on me ( I am sure that was some kind of magic stuff) and proclaimed me cured! I was going to live! Hooray!

Moving again

As we both got a bit older, my family moved to Dunn Loring, Virginia, about 10 miles outside of Falls Church. Bill's family moved to Bethesda, Maryland, so our visits were further apart. Somewhere along the line Bill's family got bigger, and a sister, Anne, joined him. Like all good boy kids do, we ignored her! (I had sisters of my own to ignore as well!)

I would go out to Bill's home for sleepovers from time to time. I remember one long night when we stayed up way too late watching a science fiction horror movie together ("Day of the Triffids" - a classic!). Neither of us could sleep that night, so we stayed up the entire night talking about the adventures we were sure to have when we grew up. We also kept a sharp eye out for invaders from another planet!

Losing Contact

As we moved into high school, Bill and I stopped seeing each other as much, but our moms kept us in contact. Those two were still best friends. They would get together for breakfast often, either in Maryland, or back in Virginia. Eventually I lost touch with Bill.

Reconnecting

I had graduated from College, and was living in Dayton, Ohio, when I had a chance to reconnect will Bill and his Family. It was 1982, and Bill's sister, Anne, who I still knew very little about, was getting married. I was invited, with my Mom, of course, to the wedding.

What was memorable about that weekend, was that my mother was retiring from 31 years working in the Pentagon that same week. Of course, I came home for the retirement ceremony, which was a big deal!

I wore my Air Force uniform to the Pentagon, where a room full of Army Generals stood up and told tales of how vital my mom had been to the workings of the Office of the Chief of Staff. Even President Regan sent her a present, a signed picture of the White House, for her retirement. It was something!

A few days later, we all gathered in an old church in Alexandria for Anne's wedding. She became Anne Berry Howe that day, and Bill and I had some time to visit and catch up on what we were doing.

Photography

Eventually, Bill moved to Los Angeles, to start a career in photography. I know he was active at that for many years. He got married while there, to the daughter of a film executive from Mexico, and ended up living in Beverly Hills.

Through my mom, and a few phone calls, I heard tales of life there, and it was something out of a movie. On one of my trips to LA, I even drove through Beverly Hills, looking around and wondering where Bill might be. Silly me, I never tried to set up a visit while he lived there.

So Bill and I again lost contact.

Last Vists with the Berry's

My mom and Bill's mom never stopped being friends. Eventually, Elton retired from the State Department, and he and Ruth moved into an apartment in Arlington, Virginia. I took my mom to visit with them on one of my trips back to D.C while I was still living in Dayton. I remember spending a nice evening, then going out to dinner with those two fine folks. We spent hours telling stories of all of us living back in Falls Church. It was a great visit.

Then I lost all of them!

For years, I had no idea what had happened to any of them. I sent Christmas cards to Ruth and Elton, but never to Bill. Eventually, those cards started being returned, and I feared the worse.

Then, on a whim, I did a bit of searching on the Internet for information about Anne. Surely, I could find out something through her.

Anne Berry

I really wish I had paid more attention to Anne when we were kids. She turned into a pretty neat person, in spite of growing up around Bill and I as kids! I finally found an article about her wedding that was published in the New York Times. She was a founding member of the Rockville Dance Company in NYC, and from what my mom told me, was very well respected in the dance community in New York. I got no where in finding a way to contact her, though.

Finally, I tried looking her up on Facebook. Bingo! She had a page there. (Who does not, these days).

So, I posted a message on her page, asking if she would let me know what had happened to Bill. I heard nothing back for several months.

Then last night, she reached out. She was new to Facebook, and had not seen my message until that day. Sadly, Bill had died, and she broke that news to me in her message.

I wish I had tried harder to make contact months ago, but that chance has now been lost.

Bill's Legacy

I am going to call Anne, and visit with her in a day or so. I wanted to get my memories in order before I did that, and even get this post on my blog. I looked up Bill's Facebook page, and found several of his photographs there. On Anne's page I found this picture of the Berry family:

That is Anne on the left. Next to her is Elton, looking just like I remember him, a distinguished man. Next to him is Bill. On the right is his brother, John, who I know hardly anything about.

I can see Bill even behind the beard. That kid who grew up with me, and who sat with me as we were getting ready for school, drawing silly kids pictures. He left behind two kids, who I hope inherited some of his spark for life. I know they will miss their dad. I miss him even more now, knowing he is gone.

The Moral of the Story

There is a moral in all this. You will have many friends during your life, and as you get older, you will have memories of them, and of the times you shared long ago. Do not let those friendships go. They are valuable to you and to them as well. I admit that my cancer battle has pushed me into reliving much of my life, and writing about those memories in this blog. The regrets I have now, are for those contacts I have lost. I missed a chance to visit again with Bill, and there are others I need to find as well. I wonder about them, and may yet reach out to see how they are doing.

Thank you, Anne, for letting me know about Bill. I wish you and your family the best as you grieve for him.

Rest in Peace Bill!